HOUSE

I'm so in love with our house! It is so crazy how everything just happened, I think my last post was about how I was washing my hands from house hunting because I could not take the emotional ups and downs of it all and then we literally got "the call" two days later and BAM we had a house! I love our neighborhood and neighbors...they are all younger families with small kids. Its so much fun to sit on the patio with all the girls watching our kids play together while we can have "mommy time" Its awesome to finally talk about something other than eating habits and poop colors! HA I do miss my family a lot but I still see them all the time because they are only 20 minutes away. The best part about it is our pool has a little kiddie pool with that cool mushroom thing in it! I can't wait for it to open and the cookout we will have every night! Pictures are up on my facebook...this blog isnt private and my facebook is as private as it gets so go there and look at them! Finals are going on right now...ugh i hate my life and Kenzie loves daycare. This place is awesome...you have to have a code to get in and once you get in there is a finger print reader that will bring up Kenzies name when it recognizes your print then there is another code you have to put in then you can get your baby! The doors are locked all the time and every room has a camera so at any point I can get online and see what she is doing! Super cool! She loves it and loves being with all the kids...I miss her like crazy during the day but it has been nice to be able to study without worrying about what she is getting into. We are all going to New Jersey next week to see my sister and New York for a day or so I can't wait except im a little nervous about the plane ride with Kenzie.

Dear Publix Bakery

Dear Publix Bakery,

I would like to take five minutes out of your busy cake/cookie baking day to make a few small complaints about your products. My first is why oh why do your cakes have to be so fricken amazing?!? Do you understand that America is going through a crisis with obesity? I would like to suggest that you start over baking your products so they are not so perfectly melt-in-you-mouth good. I also want to complain about how light and airy your buttercream frosting is. Maybe just maybe you can make it so thick that when you put it in your mouth, one must spit it back out because its too think to swollow! I think that with these few small changes you, Publix Bakery, can fix Americas growing obesity problem.

Thanks

Kendra Corley

AND THE HUSBAND OF THE YEAR AWARD GOES TOO....

Ok so because im in such a wonderful PMS filled mood right now I want to make a post dedicated to all the Tiger Woods and Jesse James out there....

I have no idea what their wifes feel at this exact moment nor do I ever want too. I have been cheated on(not to the same extent that these women have been cheated on but it was more than him kissing somebody else) by someone who I would have literally died for and I can still to this day remember ever single emotion I felt and how much not only mental pain BUT physical pain as well. You cheating men are PATHETIC DOUCHE BAGS!!! Tiger for example, his wife is so amazingly gorgeous. I know, I have no idea what their marriage was like behind closed doors but if it really was that bad that you need to stick your peen in somebody else GET A DIVORCE!!! Mr. James's wife is probably the most loved actress on this earth right now AND just recieved an amazing OSCAR....really you douche?!? You had to steal her thunder with your mistress opening up her UGLY tattooed face for $30,000. REAL CLASSY JESSE JAMES! YOUR AWESOME

I don't know about everybody else but when I married my husband it was because I could not even imagine myself being with anybody else in this world. It was about knowing that my life without him wouldn't be a life at all. Sure I think other men are hott...who doesn't but have I ever had a desire to be with another man?!? That would be a BIG N O!!! All you little cheating jerks need to get a life and I hope that one day your male parts will be covered in EVERY single STD there is out there!

I would like to take this time to thank my husband for being faithful even though I am 36 pounds heavier then I was when we first met, bitchier than I was when we first met, more emotional then I was when we first met and still have not completly gotten over my little spending problem that I had when we first me. Thank you for loving me for me and not needing to go out into the world to find something more! You truly are an amazing husband and best friend.

Ok...ok...ok

Dear Sissy and Carrie Lynn!

I read all your hate comments about my blog! COOL....you people talk to me at least every other day so you already know whats going on in my uncool boring life right now BUT to put a stop to the anger I will update and post!

This semester is almost OVER!!! YAY I have like a few weeks off then back to school for 11 weeks I think and then another little break and then fall semester! I have narrowed down nursing schools to three that I would love to get into....EMORY...Piedmont...and Kennesaw! I for sure want my BSN so we are totally skipping over the whole ASN nonsense which means North Georgia is out! I still would love to be a history teacher BUT as we all know I really really really love shoes and well a history teachers salary won't get me many shoes!

Kenzie Lynn is still the cutest baby in the world! I friggin love her face! She seriously is the coolest child ever AND she is starting to lay down with me in bed! We can watch an entire episode of Agent Oso together without her getting up once! She is a little shoes queen just like me and loves to go try on shoes! Jake wants to kill me BUT he can get over it! She lives for going outside so now that it is in the 70's we have been living outside (not literally of course) She has the sweetest laugh and keeps a bow in her hair for more than two seconds. She can moo like a cow, meow like a kitty cat, ohoh ahah like a monkey and RAW like a dinosaur. Her favorite word is NO and we are playing with the idea of going in the big girl potty. She still has not accomplished this yet but every day she gets closer and closer.

Jake is still working like there is no tomorrow but don't feel too sorry for him cause he really loves his job. He basically is gone a week home a week and so on and so on. I miss him a lot and after many tears and fights we finally got the routine down. (I am a woman for a strict routine and when it gets messed up I stress out majorly) He is still the hottest man alive and most amazingly wonderfuly husband ever!

The animals (Nolan, Kane, and Panda) are doing well...Panda gets really annoyed with Kenzie and tries to stay away as much as she can but sometimes Kenzie will catch her and love on her a little too hard. My cat is 6 pounds so when Kenzie lays her 23 pound body on her P gets annoyed. The dogs love her so much and love giving her rides and cuddling her.

House hunting is well house hunting...really annoying and im starting to think we are going to live with my parents FOREVER (ok not really) but its stressful and I wish I could snap my fingers and the perfect house would appear!

I am looking forward to Carrie and Larry coming down when they have their spring break (except I don't know if this is really going to happen because we have not really talked about it for a few weeks) and I can't wait to go to New Jersey in May to see my SEESTER! UHMMM beach here I come!

Sorry life is boring and there are no pictures to post BUT I promise next time I post I will have lots of cutie pictures. Jake and I are going to the Atlanta Ballet on the 27 so I have to get all dressed up and my dress is nothing short of friggin AMAZING! Thanks Kelli Kerlin for letting me steal it. We are going to a fancy dinner first then the Ballet and maybe even stay in a fancy hotel after!

Carrie and Nichole hope this fills your blogging appetite for the next week! LOVE YOU

Recently

Life has been a little "egdy" latley. I don't even know if that word makes sense, but to me its the perfect word. Don't worry things between Jake and I are good besides our little fights here and there but let me tell you life is HARD! Jake has been spending most of his days out of town which leaves me on mommy duty 24-7 and trying to find time to study and do school work has been very difficult. To add to the stress, Jake and I have been living in my parentals basement for the past few months too look for a house and recently my Grandmother became ill and both my moms parents need our space. So this boils down to us finding a house within a few weeks to purchase which adds even more stress on me. Have you ever had a panic attack? I HAVE it sucks its like you can't catch your breath and all your doing is sitting down. Its like a weight is on your chest pushing down really hard to make it hard to breath and your stomach is all tied up in millions of little knots that the only way to sit is the fatel position because any other way will make you scream out in pain. YEA thats been my life the past two weeks. Its been really really hard. I have been on edge so my daughter was unhappy and my poor husband was getting cussed out everyday for nothing. (Well some days he deserved it but not as badly as what I gave him) Anyways...I promise this is not a depressing post
So this past weekend Jake was home and we talked about a lot of things and figured some stuff out. Starting in the summer, my baby is going into daycare. Its what is best for her, she gets so bored at home all day and I really need time to study so I can get into my top nursing school choice! We also decided to wait on buying a house for a little while. We will either rent a house or apartment while still looking for our perfect house. Plus im thinking I want to build a house so it has EVERYTHING I want...im really picky. The stress of buying a house is nothing like I have ever felt before. Its so up and down and up and down and right now my poor little body just can't handle it. The past two days have been really good. Jake is out of town but Kenzie and I have been spending a lot of stress free time together. She really is the cutest little thing out there (even when she is not taking her nap like she is supposed too...i can hear her right now) She has all these cute little "tricks" she does and she gets so happy to see how Jake and I react to them. This weekend we are going to my grandparents house to visit with the entire family which I am super excited about and then the next week is my much needed and deserved SPRING BREAK!!! I plan on sleeping in until 8:00 am every morning and not open my books once!

Terrible Two's WHAT?!?

My daughter has been fairly easy on me up til this point in her life. I know I complained about not enough sleep here and there but the child has been really really good! This will lead me into my story...My daughter is so independent, she has to drink from a big girl cup with no lid, she has to brush her own teeth, and she has to put on her own chapstick! Her favorite word is NO and PAPA (maybe thats because my father gives her WHATEVER she wants!) So the other day I was on the phone crying to my dear friend Courtney Hawkins complaining about something or another when I hear Kenzie splashing around in some water in the bathroom...this could only mean one things...POTTY TIME! So I yelled "Kenzie get out of the toilet thats gross" she proceeds to say NO NO NO! So I say "ONE(pause a few seconds) TWO(pause a few seconds) now in any normal situation she would come running into the room laughing because she finds my frustration funny but this time she came out of the bathroom looked at me and said "THREE" then took off running down the hall. If I was in a good mood this would have made me laugh but because I had already been pushed over the edge that day I got so mad! I put the phone down and chased my child down the hall to give her a spanking....after I spanked her (don't worry it was over and jeans and diaper) she gave me the nastiest look ever and HIT yes HIT my face! OMG I could have screamed! So I went and put her in her crib and told her to think about her lifes decisions until Mommy could get her boiling blood level back down again. Instead of crying she sat down and started loving on her blanket singing to herself.

I know I was a really hard teenager and gave my mother hell....but really this is a little early for payback! OH MY this is going to be a long next few months!

Mad List

So im not mad right at this exact moment but this past week has been a brutal one! I feel like the best way of expressing emotions is to write them all down so here goes....

1. I'm mad that Jake has been away a lot these past few weeks (I'm talking like 3 weeks in a row a lot)
2. I'm mad that he is playing "security guard" in a place that somebody gets stabbed/shot/beaten at least once a week
3. I'm mad that Jake thinks that the extra money is worth it....REALLY I JUST WANT MY HUSBAND
4. I'm mad at the things I say to him when im mad (I really am a HUGE BITCH when im upset and I say things I don't mean)
5. I'm mad that because I am so exhausted ALL THE TIME that I get frustrated with Kenzie more easily
6. I'm mad at people/friends who try to take advantage of me
7. I'm mad at how people judge me as a mother because I own a pitbull...seriously if you spent two minutes with him you would love him more than you love your own dogs
8. I'm mad at how over the years people wanted to "look good" so they bought houses/cars/too much on their credit cards that they couldn't afford and now because of their actions we are having a really hard time getting a loan for a house even if we have good credit! THANKS you idiots!
9. I'm mad that my grandma is sick
10. I'm mad that my daughter is starting the terrible two 5 months early! NOT COOL
11. I'm mad that im so tired all the time...I wish I could live off of no sleep so I could get everything done
12. I'm mad that I am so OCD all the time about a clean house...I have an almost two year old I need to come to accept that its bound to be a mess all the time
13. I'm mad that even when im done with laundry by the end of the night there is still another full load waiting to be washed. How does that even happen?
14. I'm mad that shoe designers have such creative minds and because of that I'm obsessed with shoes (this goes for purses as well) Even when I have a full closet full the "shoe craving" is always still there and thanks to the interent and online shopping I will never stop
15. I'm mad that food tastes so good so when im sad or mad thats the first thing I run too! HELLO 500 pounds here I come!
16. I'm mad because even when I have ever intention to work out something always comes up (except for the past few days...I have to put my foot down and do what is good for me)
17. I'm mad at dirty dishes
18. I'm mad at the broken glass that I stepped on
19. I'm mad at the kitty litter I feel like I change every other day
20. I'm mad at being mad

With all that said....Jake was home this weekend and I fell in love with him all over again and even though I should not have had to of been reminded of why I married him I was and I love him even more for it! I love that he works so hard for Kenzie and I to have everything we want and I happy I got to express to him this past weekend that its not so much about "things" we just want him home. I don't need anymore shoes and Kenzie doesn't need anymore clothes...all we need is him. I am so thankful for my dog...I know you non-animal people can't relate like my mother but if it wasn't for my dog I don't know what I would have done. When I would cry at night he was right there beside me and when I needed to spoon with him he was more than willing. I am glad for my real friends who are there all the time. I'm glad I can pick up the phone and just cry to them for hours and they sit and listen and tell me what I need to hear! This week is going to be better I promise! I need to change my attitude on life....at least Jake has a job and at least I get to go to school. I love my family and friends so much and I know I count on you all a lot and I thank you for all being there no matter what!