FACES

Guess what keeps me going after a week like this (and its only Wednesday)....

:)

While the husbands away....the wifey gets to play!

WRONG!!!

Ugh..so while my husband is off being all hottie and junk riding a motorcycle all over florida I get to stay at home and do homework and clean! AWESOME. I was supposed to go with him and then I decided I needed to stay home and be a good student. He left Wednesday I didn't go to school on Thrusday because I felt like puking and I didn't go to school today because I felt like puking again! I started to feel sorry for myself so I bought a pregnany test hoping it would brighten up my little old day and it came back -NO! SUCK MY LIFE!! Oh well there is always next month I suppose :( Anyways my big plans are to clean and do homework how lame is that?!?

Rocks, Pimples, and COFFEE

Have you all seen that Beyonce movie obsessed?!? The crazy lady in that movie is EXACTLY how my daughter acts towards.....ROCKS!!! Ok so most little girls like flowers but my daughter
L O V E S rocks!!! Every day as I was pulling clothes out of the washer I would find a handful of rocks. At first I was really confused and blamed my husband for my laundry findings (sorry jake) but then after a weekend in the mountains with my family I realized it was Kenzie. At school she was the "rock" trendsetter so now all the other moms hate me because their washers are full of rocks as well. (Ok so they don't really hate me but i'm sure they hate the rocks)

I feel as if I am back in middle school because my face is crater-park central! EWWW Its awful! I don't know if it is because I am really stressed, changed my face wash, off birth control or a combination of all three BUT all I know is if my pimple face does not SLOW down my butt is heading to the dermatologist PRONTO!

I have a confession to make...a dirty little confession...The other night I pulled an all nighter and the only way I could make that happen is if I drank coffee. Normal people would drink a few cokes but because I drink a few cokes a day soda does nothing for my sleepyness! Anyways so I drank all this hazelnut coffee and now I am addicted! My teeth are going to be yellow in about six months but its a small price to pay to be able to get through my day.

School is going really well. I am so happy I decided to drop my math class...as of right now I have high A's in all my classes. Its still extremely hot in Georgia so I hope the weather changes soon because I LOVE LOVE LOVE fall and all the fall fashions!

SCHOOL

This semester is going to be a blast! I am three days in and honestly don't have anything to complain about! I am super excited about Spanish cause I'm with the same professor and he is awesome. BRING IT ON!

Back to School....Back to School!

I feel like this little two week break was a major major tease. NOT COOL! School starts again on Monday and boy am I in for a treat this semester....

Biology 1101
Biology 1101 Lab
Communications 1100
Math 1111
Human Growth and Development 2103
Spanish 1102

I feel a little nervous about this schedule but my advisor promised me I would be fine. EMORY here I come. I asked him what I could do to "pad" my transcript and he told me to join a sorority HAHAHAH. Literally I laughed at him I also said did you forget that I have a two year old and a husband. I'm not really much of sorority girl material anymore. Instead of having mixers at my house I could invite the girls over for a little diaper changing lesson. We both got a good laugh out of that one BUT he did say that greek life at gainesville wasn't like the movies. So guess who is signing up for a sorority this week. It kinds makes me sad though I think it would be funny to be a part of rush week and such but oh well. I get to pay like $150.00 just so that the school will put a Greek letter on my transcript. Anything to get in right? I also am going to start volunteering at the Womens Center at Northside. I want an in and I think that will help. So my dear friends for the next few months of my life I will try to keep you all updated but I will probably be spending all my time in the library and bed!

Time to get personal

This little blog is really my only place to write down my feelings and usually I try to make it super positive because who really wants to read somebody complaining about their life drama? Today my friends is going to be negative nelly day so if your not in a mood to read a vent session I suggest you hit the little arrow back button quickly!

Do you ever have those days where you literally want to scream as loud as you can and then just ball your eyes out? Today was that day to a T for me. It started off by getting NO sleep last night because one...my boob was killing me (yea totally time for a new bra ASAP one girl is not getting any support) and two my daughter was screaming because she wanted her daddy. This just happens to be Jakes week out of town AWESOME! So Kenzie and I had big play date plans set for today so instead of taking her to daycare I put her in my bed with the TV on while I took a shower. Our master bathroom is connected to our closet and its not unusual for Kenzie to go in the closet and try on my shoes (it makes me so happy when she does that I think its really cute). Most of you mommies know that there is a quiet and a too quiet with children and well Kenzie was WAY WAY WAY TOO QUIET! I got out of the shower and looked in my closet and there she was with her sunblock bottle and sunblock all over the floor, her ENTIRE body, and a pair of $100.00 shoes that I have yet to wear! When she see's that im upset she gets this little grin on her face and says...Where's Daddy? AHHHHHHHHHH

Then we go on our play date and the kids are playing in the sprinkler out front. Kenzie went around the corner of the house for 2 SECONDS and in those two short seconds she managed to paint a section of Sherrils brown house white! 2 SECONDS AHHHHHHHHHHHH

After getting home we walked over to Nicole's house because she just found out she is having a BOY!!!! Of course I want to go see my best friend so while we are talking about all things baby and my big plans for her shower my daughter manages to hit Luke multiple times and then as im repremanding her hits me in my bad boob with a freaking xbox game case! AHHHHHHHHHH

Time out is a no go because suprise suprise she likes it in time out AND puts herself in it without being in trouble and when I spank her booty it doesn't phase her at all. I was warned about terrible two's and im not kidding they are horrible and the worst part is I can be so mad and all she has to do is walk up to me and say "Mommy hold you hold you" Or "Mommy I love you" Or "Cuddle Mommy" and I melt! Tonight she was giving me a hard time about going to bed and seriously I was so over the day but while we were singing she started singing with me the lullabye that my mom wrote and sung for me while I was a child. Every ounce of anger and frustration was gone as she was looking up at me singing with me.

After she went to bed I watched yesterdays SYTYCD. Kents last dance was about two best friends and one of them got stabbed in the back. So this has happened to me recently in and it sucks. I sat on my couch watching this dance crying like a little baby. No joke fetal position and all. Seriously why do girls have to be such bitches! I feel like I go above and beyond for my friends and this person just made me feel awful. I get so sick thinking about it. Jake has hated her for years and I stuck up for her! My husband and I have fought about her hundreds of times and I wouldn't take his advice. UGH I feel like an idiot and it sucks!

So im glad I vented about life please don't think I hate being a mom because I honestly love it more than anything in the world. My daughter is so amazing and I would not change one little part of her (even the attitude) if I could.

HAPPY 1 YEAR LOVER

I know im a little late but July 18 was Jake and I's 1 year anniversary! We were lucky enough to have an awesome weekend vacation at the beach (his sister came with us but was in a different condo). This post is for you baby

Thank you for being my other half.

Thank you for holding me while I cry about stupid things.

Thank you for looking at me the way you look at me (your googley eyes).

Thank you for being such an awesome Daddy.

Thank you for giving me a beautiful healthy daughter.

Thank you for our house.

Thank you for understanding my need to go back to school.

Thank you for telling me how beautiful I am even on my no shower days.

Thank you for working so hard for us.

Thank you for understanding my obsession with animals.

Thank you for not laughing at me when I talk to my kitty in my special "panda" voice.

Thank you for joking with me all the time.

Thank you for eating my cooking (I know im pretty bad).

Thank you for listening to me vent even when its about girl drama.

Thank you for letting me control the radio when im in the car.

Thank you for ignoring me when im being a complete bitch (especially this summer...i promise no more summer session).

Thank you for understanding that sometimes I just need to yell.

Thank you for being so willing to get my chocolate and girly products when its that time of the month.

Thank you for watching Greys and Pretty Little Liars with me.

Thank you for loving me no matter what.

Thank you for loving my family (I know sometimes we can be weird).

Thank you for always being there for me.

Thank you for always laughing with me.

Thank you for making me the happiest I have ever been in my life.

Thank you for not running away when you met the "broken me"

Thank you for helping me find myself again.

Thank you for making me want to become a better person.

Thank you for being the best friend I could ever ask for.

Thank you for choosing me to spend the rest of your life with.

Thank you for being my husband!

I love you more than you will ever know and my thank you list could go on and on and on! I hope you know just how amazing you truly are!

I Promise I'm Not Dead!

Summer semester has taken over my life! Literally! While Kenzie and Jake are enjoying the pool, I am stuck inside doing hundreds and hundreds of math problems. When Jake and Kenzie are at the neighborhood cook (that happens almost everyday) I am stuck inside writing papers about A Raisin in the Sun! STUPID STUPID STUPID idea to take summer classes. I LOVE laying out at the pool during summer and hanging out with friends WHAT WAS I THINKING?!?

Now that my rant is over with I can fill you all in on life! I really don't know where to start so lets go with New Jersey.

Jersey was fun but really really cold. We had a ton of fun in New York and Jake and I decided that we need to take a long weekend and spend it in the city! So much we wanted to see that we just didn't have time for.

After Jersey school started. I had signed up for three classes and now am only down to two. Summer semester is 16 weeks worth of material compressed into eight. I had signed up for math 99 english 1102 and communications 1100. I went to all my classes for the first three weeks and then decided that I needed to drop communications. That teacher HATED me! I have no earthly idea what I did/said but from the moment she called my name that first day of class she was nothing but hateful towards me. I am working really hard to get the HOPE scholarship and if this women failed me I would not get it. She really had issues!

Matt and Stac graduated. My cuz and I have a very special bond. We have become really close over the five-six years. I am so proud of him he is going to Wake Forest. Even though WAKE is FAKE I will try not to talk badly about it because he is going there! (GO CAROLINA) My little Stacey McKenzie who is basically my sister is moving across the country to SUCKtah! (sorry to those who live and love it there im just a little bitter about her leaving) I am so proud of her as well even though she learned from the best.

Kenzie turned 2!!! Oh my gosh can I please just say I feel like I found out I was pregnant yesterday! My small little blob has turned into a dancing/sentence speaking machine! She is so so cute! We do these cute little tickle wars with her and as she is laughing she says MOMMY STOP DADDY STOP! Her party was a princess theme which fits her well because the child is the most spoiled thing I have ever seen. We rented this really cool castle bounce house and had a castle cake made for her. It was so fun and that girl got so much stuff. She got two pairs of dress up heels (You know the ones we used to play with as kids) and she LIVES in them. She also got fake lipstick/makeup set which she loves almost as much as the shoes. I told everyone to get her books because my child loves to be read too. Its so important for me to read to her because my Mom did it for us kids when we were little. Its amazing how awesome a feeling it is to be doing something for your own child that your parent did for you. I had no idea how much love my parents had for me and now I can understand it because I feel the same way for Kenzie.

4th of July was so much fun and very eventful! We had stuff to do every day and I don't think Kenzie went to bed before 11:00 any night that weekend! I am such a bedtime nazi I think the first night about about died when I realized how late it was and the next morning I had to wake her up at 6:00 to get ready for the town parade. I went into her room and she yelled at me when I turned the light on saying "NO! I SLEEPY!!" Jake and I were laughing so hard. I did get to spend all day Sunday at the pool so I was very thankful for that.

This Wednesday Jake and I are going to PANAMA CITY BEACH (florida) for our anniversary. We weren't going to do anything for it this year but we have both been so stressed with school and work I made the executive decision that this was a much much needed vacation. Sometimes I feel like we get too stressed in our own little worlds that when we are together we take it out on each other. Panama is so needed....and I think we are going parasailing! YEA!

After Panama Carrie and Larry are coming down for a few days so im really excited about that. They come after school gets out so I will be able to hang out by the pool all day with them and have a cute little three week break before fall semester starts back up again!

Ok picture time!!!!

Subway on our way to China Town!

Ferris Wheel in the Toy R Us in Times Square! Kenzie had a blast!

Matt and Stac graduated so we went to Eden! Yes....chopped more than half my hair off and decided to become a blonde again...much needed change!
Kenzie right before Daddy-Daughter pool time! I was inside writing a paper.
Jake was picture taker so he is not in any of her party pictures! I know I should have had somebody else take them....its not like there weren't three sets of grandparents there. She had an awesome outfit change TuTu and shirt were done by this lady I found on facebook and she gave me an awesome deal! Kenzie LOVES her tutu!

HAPPY

One of my favorite celebrities is Tori Spelling. I think she is so funny and she balances her family/work life wonderfuly. Tonight, as I was watching her show I could not help but to think about my little family and how grateful I am for them. Jake is so so awesome and I love him with everything I have. I love how much we laugh with each other...I think that is one of the most important things to have with your partner. I love how he is such an awesome father to our daughter. Its so funny to watch them play "kitchen" together or read books. Ever since we have moved our relationship has gotten become so much stronger. I loved living with my parents but let me tell you...HELLO STRESS! It was hard really hard but moving and being on our own again is exactly what we needed. I also feel less lonely when he is out of town which is every other week. I think its because our best friends are our neighbors so they are my family when he is gone. My daughter is amazing. Everyday she does something new. I can't believe I can have a full conversation with her, I feel like it was just yesterday she was born and now she is turning 2?!? What the heck. She is so sweet AND she even cuddles with us now. I love seeing her personality shining through more and more everyday. For example, she picks out what shoes she is going to wear everyday! My mom said I was the same way when I was her age. She is my best friend and I can't even begin to think of what my life would be like without her. I love standing in her room when she is asleep just watching her...she is such a happy little girl and that makes me feel so wonderful. I love our animal children...yes i refer to them as my furry children...we love them and they love us, they also keep me sane when hubs is gone! The boys (the dogs) especially keep me company at night (they snuggle better than Jake...just don't tell him I said that)
School ended and I landed myself on the merit list for spring semester! YAY I never really focused on anything school related before so its nice knowing that when I do try I can come out on top. School starts again in June so I have had the past few weeks off...it has been exactly what I needed! Right now things in life are going really well and I can't help but to step back and look at how blessed we really are. I have so much to be thankful for I can't wait to see where the next few years take us!

HOUSE

I'm so in love with our house! It is so crazy how everything just happened, I think my last post was about how I was washing my hands from house hunting because I could not take the emotional ups and downs of it all and then we literally got "the call" two days later and BAM we had a house! I love our neighborhood and neighbors...they are all younger families with small kids. Its so much fun to sit on the patio with all the girls watching our kids play together while we can have "mommy time" Its awesome to finally talk about something other than eating habits and poop colors! HA I do miss my family a lot but I still see them all the time because they are only 20 minutes away. The best part about it is our pool has a little kiddie pool with that cool mushroom thing in it! I can't wait for it to open and the cookout we will have every night! Pictures are up on my facebook...this blog isnt private and my facebook is as private as it gets so go there and look at them! Finals are going on right now...ugh i hate my life and Kenzie loves daycare. This place is awesome...you have to have a code to get in and once you get in there is a finger print reader that will bring up Kenzies name when it recognizes your print then there is another code you have to put in then you can get your baby! The doors are locked all the time and every room has a camera so at any point I can get online and see what she is doing! Super cool! She loves it and loves being with all the kids...I miss her like crazy during the day but it has been nice to be able to study without worrying about what she is getting into. We are all going to New Jersey next week to see my sister and New York for a day or so I can't wait except im a little nervous about the plane ride with Kenzie.

Dear Publix Bakery

Dear Publix Bakery,

I would like to take five minutes out of your busy cake/cookie baking day to make a few small complaints about your products. My first is why oh why do your cakes have to be so fricken amazing?!? Do you understand that America is going through a crisis with obesity? I would like to suggest that you start over baking your products so they are not so perfectly melt-in-you-mouth good. I also want to complain about how light and airy your buttercream frosting is. Maybe just maybe you can make it so thick that when you put it in your mouth, one must spit it back out because its too think to swollow! I think that with these few small changes you, Publix Bakery, can fix Americas growing obesity problem.

Thanks

Kendra Corley

AND THE HUSBAND OF THE YEAR AWARD GOES TOO....

Ok so because im in such a wonderful PMS filled mood right now I want to make a post dedicated to all the Tiger Woods and Jesse James out there....

I have no idea what their wifes feel at this exact moment nor do I ever want too. I have been cheated on(not to the same extent that these women have been cheated on but it was more than him kissing somebody else) by someone who I would have literally died for and I can still to this day remember ever single emotion I felt and how much not only mental pain BUT physical pain as well. You cheating men are PATHETIC DOUCHE BAGS!!! Tiger for example, his wife is so amazingly gorgeous. I know, I have no idea what their marriage was like behind closed doors but if it really was that bad that you need to stick your peen in somebody else GET A DIVORCE!!! Mr. James's wife is probably the most loved actress on this earth right now AND just recieved an amazing OSCAR....really you douche?!? You had to steal her thunder with your mistress opening up her UGLY tattooed face for $30,000. REAL CLASSY JESSE JAMES! YOUR AWESOME

I don't know about everybody else but when I married my husband it was because I could not even imagine myself being with anybody else in this world. It was about knowing that my life without him wouldn't be a life at all. Sure I think other men are hott...who doesn't but have I ever had a desire to be with another man?!? That would be a BIG N O!!! All you little cheating jerks need to get a life and I hope that one day your male parts will be covered in EVERY single STD there is out there!

I would like to take this time to thank my husband for being faithful even though I am 36 pounds heavier then I was when we first met, bitchier than I was when we first met, more emotional then I was when we first met and still have not completly gotten over my little spending problem that I had when we first me. Thank you for loving me for me and not needing to go out into the world to find something more! You truly are an amazing husband and best friend.

Ok...ok...ok

Dear Sissy and Carrie Lynn!

I read all your hate comments about my blog! COOL....you people talk to me at least every other day so you already know whats going on in my uncool boring life right now BUT to put a stop to the anger I will update and post!

This semester is almost OVER!!! YAY I have like a few weeks off then back to school for 11 weeks I think and then another little break and then fall semester! I have narrowed down nursing schools to three that I would love to get into....EMORY...Piedmont...and Kennesaw! I for sure want my BSN so we are totally skipping over the whole ASN nonsense which means North Georgia is out! I still would love to be a history teacher BUT as we all know I really really really love shoes and well a history teachers salary won't get me many shoes!

Kenzie Lynn is still the cutest baby in the world! I friggin love her face! She seriously is the coolest child ever AND she is starting to lay down with me in bed! We can watch an entire episode of Agent Oso together without her getting up once! She is a little shoes queen just like me and loves to go try on shoes! Jake wants to kill me BUT he can get over it! She lives for going outside so now that it is in the 70's we have been living outside (not literally of course) She has the sweetest laugh and keeps a bow in her hair for more than two seconds. She can moo like a cow, meow like a kitty cat, ohoh ahah like a monkey and RAW like a dinosaur. Her favorite word is NO and we are playing with the idea of going in the big girl potty. She still has not accomplished this yet but every day she gets closer and closer.

Jake is still working like there is no tomorrow but don't feel too sorry for him cause he really loves his job. He basically is gone a week home a week and so on and so on. I miss him a lot and after many tears and fights we finally got the routine down. (I am a woman for a strict routine and when it gets messed up I stress out majorly) He is still the hottest man alive and most amazingly wonderfuly husband ever!

The animals (Nolan, Kane, and Panda) are doing well...Panda gets really annoyed with Kenzie and tries to stay away as much as she can but sometimes Kenzie will catch her and love on her a little too hard. My cat is 6 pounds so when Kenzie lays her 23 pound body on her P gets annoyed. The dogs love her so much and love giving her rides and cuddling her.

House hunting is well house hunting...really annoying and im starting to think we are going to live with my parents FOREVER (ok not really) but its stressful and I wish I could snap my fingers and the perfect house would appear!

I am looking forward to Carrie and Larry coming down when they have their spring break (except I don't know if this is really going to happen because we have not really talked about it for a few weeks) and I can't wait to go to New Jersey in May to see my SEESTER! UHMMM beach here I come!

Sorry life is boring and there are no pictures to post BUT I promise next time I post I will have lots of cutie pictures. Jake and I are going to the Atlanta Ballet on the 27 so I have to get all dressed up and my dress is nothing short of friggin AMAZING! Thanks Kelli Kerlin for letting me steal it. We are going to a fancy dinner first then the Ballet and maybe even stay in a fancy hotel after!

Carrie and Nichole hope this fills your blogging appetite for the next week! LOVE YOU

Recently

Life has been a little "egdy" latley. I don't even know if that word makes sense, but to me its the perfect word. Don't worry things between Jake and I are good besides our little fights here and there but let me tell you life is HARD! Jake has been spending most of his days out of town which leaves me on mommy duty 24-7 and trying to find time to study and do school work has been very difficult. To add to the stress, Jake and I have been living in my parentals basement for the past few months too look for a house and recently my Grandmother became ill and both my moms parents need our space. So this boils down to us finding a house within a few weeks to purchase which adds even more stress on me. Have you ever had a panic attack? I HAVE it sucks its like you can't catch your breath and all your doing is sitting down. Its like a weight is on your chest pushing down really hard to make it hard to breath and your stomach is all tied up in millions of little knots that the only way to sit is the fatel position because any other way will make you scream out in pain. YEA thats been my life the past two weeks. Its been really really hard. I have been on edge so my daughter was unhappy and my poor husband was getting cussed out everyday for nothing. (Well some days he deserved it but not as badly as what I gave him) Anyways...I promise this is not a depressing post
So this past weekend Jake was home and we talked about a lot of things and figured some stuff out. Starting in the summer, my baby is going into daycare. Its what is best for her, she gets so bored at home all day and I really need time to study so I can get into my top nursing school choice! We also decided to wait on buying a house for a little while. We will either rent a house or apartment while still looking for our perfect house. Plus im thinking I want to build a house so it has EVERYTHING I want...im really picky. The stress of buying a house is nothing like I have ever felt before. Its so up and down and up and down and right now my poor little body just can't handle it. The past two days have been really good. Jake is out of town but Kenzie and I have been spending a lot of stress free time together. She really is the cutest little thing out there (even when she is not taking her nap like she is supposed too...i can hear her right now) She has all these cute little "tricks" she does and she gets so happy to see how Jake and I react to them. This weekend we are going to my grandparents house to visit with the entire family which I am super excited about and then the next week is my much needed and deserved SPRING BREAK!!! I plan on sleeping in until 8:00 am every morning and not open my books once!

Terrible Two's WHAT?!?

My daughter has been fairly easy on me up til this point in her life. I know I complained about not enough sleep here and there but the child has been really really good! This will lead me into my story...My daughter is so independent, she has to drink from a big girl cup with no lid, she has to brush her own teeth, and she has to put on her own chapstick! Her favorite word is NO and PAPA (maybe thats because my father gives her WHATEVER she wants!) So the other day I was on the phone crying to my dear friend Courtney Hawkins complaining about something or another when I hear Kenzie splashing around in some water in the bathroom...this could only mean one things...POTTY TIME! So I yelled "Kenzie get out of the toilet thats gross" she proceeds to say NO NO NO! So I say "ONE(pause a few seconds) TWO(pause a few seconds) now in any normal situation she would come running into the room laughing because she finds my frustration funny but this time she came out of the bathroom looked at me and said "THREE" then took off running down the hall. If I was in a good mood this would have made me laugh but because I had already been pushed over the edge that day I got so mad! I put the phone down and chased my child down the hall to give her a spanking....after I spanked her (don't worry it was over and jeans and diaper) she gave me the nastiest look ever and HIT yes HIT my face! OMG I could have screamed! So I went and put her in her crib and told her to think about her lifes decisions until Mommy could get her boiling blood level back down again. Instead of crying she sat down and started loving on her blanket singing to herself.

I know I was a really hard teenager and gave my mother hell....but really this is a little early for payback! OH MY this is going to be a long next few months!

Mad List

So im not mad right at this exact moment but this past week has been a brutal one! I feel like the best way of expressing emotions is to write them all down so here goes....

1. I'm mad that Jake has been away a lot these past few weeks (I'm talking like 3 weeks in a row a lot)
2. I'm mad that he is playing "security guard" in a place that somebody gets stabbed/shot/beaten at least once a week
3. I'm mad that Jake thinks that the extra money is worth it....REALLY I JUST WANT MY HUSBAND
4. I'm mad at the things I say to him when im mad (I really am a HUGE BITCH when im upset and I say things I don't mean)
5. I'm mad that because I am so exhausted ALL THE TIME that I get frustrated with Kenzie more easily
6. I'm mad at people/friends who try to take advantage of me
7. I'm mad at how people judge me as a mother because I own a pitbull...seriously if you spent two minutes with him you would love him more than you love your own dogs
8. I'm mad at how over the years people wanted to "look good" so they bought houses/cars/too much on their credit cards that they couldn't afford and now because of their actions we are having a really hard time getting a loan for a house even if we have good credit! THANKS you idiots!
9. I'm mad that my grandma is sick
10. I'm mad that my daughter is starting the terrible two 5 months early! NOT COOL
11. I'm mad that im so tired all the time...I wish I could live off of no sleep so I could get everything done
12. I'm mad that I am so OCD all the time about a clean house...I have an almost two year old I need to come to accept that its bound to be a mess all the time
13. I'm mad that even when im done with laundry by the end of the night there is still another full load waiting to be washed. How does that even happen?
14. I'm mad that shoe designers have such creative minds and because of that I'm obsessed with shoes (this goes for purses as well) Even when I have a full closet full the "shoe craving" is always still there and thanks to the interent and online shopping I will never stop
15. I'm mad that food tastes so good so when im sad or mad thats the first thing I run too! HELLO 500 pounds here I come!
16. I'm mad because even when I have ever intention to work out something always comes up (except for the past few days...I have to put my foot down and do what is good for me)
17. I'm mad at dirty dishes
18. I'm mad at the broken glass that I stepped on
19. I'm mad at the kitty litter I feel like I change every other day
20. I'm mad at being mad

With all that said....Jake was home this weekend and I fell in love with him all over again and even though I should not have had to of been reminded of why I married him I was and I love him even more for it! I love that he works so hard for Kenzie and I to have everything we want and I happy I got to express to him this past weekend that its not so much about "things" we just want him home. I don't need anymore shoes and Kenzie doesn't need anymore clothes...all we need is him. I am so thankful for my dog...I know you non-animal people can't relate like my mother but if it wasn't for my dog I don't know what I would have done. When I would cry at night he was right there beside me and when I needed to spoon with him he was more than willing. I am glad for my real friends who are there all the time. I'm glad I can pick up the phone and just cry to them for hours and they sit and listen and tell me what I need to hear! This week is going to be better I promise! I need to change my attitude on life....at least Jake has a job and at least I get to go to school. I love my family and friends so much and I know I count on you all a lot and I thank you for all being there no matter what!

Two in ONE DAY!!!

Ok so life lately has been BUSY. I love love love school! Did I mention that I LOVE school?? I have had my first few tests and not to brag or anything...I am making straight A's. I have never wanted something so badly so I am working my butt of for it. I'm much happier having those three hours a day just to myself learning about things I want to learn about. I had forgotten how much I love our political system and learning about how it works...well how its supposed to work. I am even enjoying MATH...SAY WHAT?!? yes I Kendra Elizabeth Corley enjoy my math class! Its difficult to find the time to study during the day but I find it don't you worry. Jake is being very supportive of me and helping out a lot with Kenzie!

SICKNESS....So last week I think it was I went to the ER twice. Once for Jake and the other time with Kenzie. Jake got this nasty viral infection, he could not keep anything down what so ever. By day three after not talking or moving for three days he lifted his head up and asked to go to the hospital. For my hubs to ask to see a doctor means he is in killer pain. So we went and he needed fluid. Then he got better went out of town for work and then lady honnah got the same thing. It was the worst experience of my life. I have never been so emotionaly/physically/mentally drained in my entire life. She was so so so sick. I took her to the hospital after a few days because I was keeping her really hydrated but she wasn't peeing! So my mom came with me to the ER and they took x-rays of her little abdomen which came back fine and then the doctor told me he needed to do a catheter on her so he could test her urine. At this point I broke down literally. It was so bad I had to leave the room (don't worry my mother was in there with her) I was sitting outside the door with my knees to my chest sobbing. Then I heard the scream...thinking about it now makes me teary eyed. It was the most horrible experience. So after that the nurse came in told me everything came back great and sent me on my way! I was PISSED!!! I toook her home put her to bed and 2 hours later she woke up screaming and making noises I have never heard before. My parents are two floors up and they woke up because it was so loud. She had no idea who I was...it was like in an excorcism movie. I was so scared. Mom and I took her temp and all it said was LOW...uhmmm I freaked. I called the ER in tears and you know what they said....oh she will be fine but if you feel like we need to see her again you can bring her back in! I wanted to slap that lady across the face! Anyways an hour and a half later she is still freaking out like when she woke up so I put her in her crib to see if she would fall asleep and not even a minute later she was out. Moral of the story....if your baby ever gets sick DO NOT TAKE THEM TO A REGULAR ER GO TO THE NEAREST CHILDRENS HOSPITAL! (even if it is an hour away) The next day Jake came home and I slept for about 24 hours while he was on parental duty. I was done. Now everything is back to normal and nobody in my family better get sick anytime soon or I will need to be admitted to the looney bin!

Hubs has been working out of town for the last two weeks and it is killing me. At first it was nice...I had the whole bed to myself just me and Kane but then I got really lonley. My dad goes out of town a lot and my mom would always end up in bed all day watching lifetime by the end of the week and I always thought she was crazy. In fact I would make fun of her. Now I understand and I do the same thing except I end up studying for something until 12:00 in the morning because it takes me that long to wake up. I really love him so much and the extra money is nice but seriously not worth it! I miss my best friend and all the other things that come in the married person package! Its ok though cause this weekend we are going to NC for the weekend without Kenzie!!! ALONE TIME!! YAY I can't wait!

Dear Husband

To my sweet dear husband,

The past few weeks you have been away on business and I just want to tell you just how much you mean to me. You work so hard for Kenzie and I and I don't tell you enough how much that means to me. Everyday when you come home from work I fall in love with your smelly, dirty self all over again. I have spent a lot of time thinking about our relationship and I love you so much. When we met, I literally was a self-destructive broken person and you picked up the pieces and put me back together again. You taught me to love myself for who I was at the moment and not who I could be if I lost 10 pounds or if my hair was longer and darker. You didn't run away after we found out I was pregnant...we didn't even love each other then. You have paid off so much of my debt and never once complained about it. You told me thats what you do when you love somebody. You have been an amazing father to our beautiful daughter who loves you so so much! You work the 60 hour weeks just so I can have that new Bakers purse you have seen me lusting after for weeks. You support me with my school work and when I made a perfect score on my first test you surprised me with two headbands!!! BABY you do so many things for me and words can not describe how much I love you. I'm so excited that my life's decisions lead me to you and im so thankful for how everything worked out. Your my best friend and I want you to know I miss you at night. Last night after teen mom was over I curled in bed next to you and you put your foot on mine. Usually this little gesture GROSSES me out and I move my foot away but for the first time I realized how much I missed that when your not in bed with me! Your gone again tonight and I will miss your foot on mine but I hope you know just how much your girls love you and how thankful we are for you! I can't wait to make more babies (well just one more) with you and I can't wait for our house and growing old together! LOVE YOU

SCHOOL

So I started school last week and its very different and interesting! Its like being back in high school all over again. They take attendance every day and you are only allowed one unexcused absence. UHMM hello....I have a child what if the babysitter ever calls out is she supposed to write me a note saying why she called out or do I just bring Kenzie to class with me? Oh well its fun though. Mon, Wed, Fri is political science from 7:00 am (thats right people AM) to 7:50 am then Spanish from 8:00 to 8:50 am then Music Appreciation from 9:00 to 9:50! Tuesdays and Thursdays are my stupid people math class 101 from 8:00 to 9:50. Kenz and I have gotten the new routine down pretty pat but there are still some days where I HAVE to take a nap when I should be studying.

Tranier McHottie (Ken) told me that the beginning of the year he was gonna kick my butt and don't you worry people, he has stuck to his word times 100! I have lost five pounds though! YAY go me! I did have that lady trainer but she has to quit to get a "real job in corporate america" thats excatly what she told me so she had me start seeing Ken. He makes it really fun where she made it not so fun! I don't do well with people getting in my face about wating a bowl of fruit loops one day!

Other than those few things life has been pretty boring around here. I can't wait for the 29-31st cause Jake and I get to road trip to North Carolina to see Carrie Lynn and Larry. Its gonna be a very nice break from Mommy-Daddy-School-Work life!

WELCOME 2010

I am so excited for the New Year. Jake and I are starting the house hunt all over again AND our house that we LOVE is still for sale! Nobody has even looked at it since us! UHMM FATE OR WHAT?!? Anyways even if it doesn't work out we still will get into a house sometime this year cross your fingers its sooner rather than later. I'm so excited about fixing up Kenzie's room. I even think I am gonna get her brand new bedding and toddler bed...maybe!

I start school on Wednesday!!! I am so so so excited, I feel like a little kid going to school for the first time. I have a pretty easy first semester so I can ease my way back in. I also want to make sure I don't overload myself because I really want to get good grades. With school also comes Kenzie going to the babysitter for the first time and im nervous about that. This lady in my parents church is going to watch her for us. She is the nicest person ever I love her family and she has a son just a little older than Kenzie so Kenz will have a good time.

Life is finally starting to settle down after the holidays. Today I was able to take a shower while Kenzie was in the other room playing with her toys. I'm really excited about that! Thank you to the person who invented the toy kitchen sets with all the plastic foods! You are AMAZING!!

Hope everybody had a safe New Year....until next time